My love hate relationship with homeschooling.
I LOVE that we don't have to be at school by 8:30am. I HATE that we don't have to be at school by 8:30am!! What do I mean. Well, I love that there is NO rushing but I don't like that some days it is so hard to get started. That some days it is 10am when we are starting our school day. With a baby you just can't say "Ok, we are starting at 9am". It is just not going to happen unless I have someone helping me with the baby.
I LOVE all of the time I get to spend with the kids. I HATE all of the time I spend with the kids!! OK, I would love to miss them a little :-) I LOVE Co-op days so that I can miss them!
All kidding aside, I've been reflecting a lot lately. Since I do work, I feel that I am not doing justice to the kids and my husband. I used to read to the kids before bed every night and now I am so tired that I don't and the thing is that my husband does not take up the slack here. Most of the time now I get the baby to sleep and let my husband get the big kids to sleep. We used to share this job. Once the baby goes to sleep I sit in front of the computer and get to work on my school work (answering e-mails, grading, checking on my students, doing my online office hours, working on SACS( our College is going through Accreditation). I get my work done and go to sleep. When I should be planning for the kids, I am working for the College, when I should be spending a little time with my husband or with the kids in the evening, I am working or just too tired to want to.....
Another reflection. I don't feel I have enough time in the day to do everything I want to do with the kids. So, if they went to school then I could just concentrate on the 'cool' things I want to teach them outside of school time that I don't have time now because I spend a lot of time on basics and baby and life.
Another reflection. I am one person, trying to do the job of educating my child which usually takes 7 teachers at school. Two full-time teachers in a Montessori classroom, the Spanish, Nature, Music, PE, and Art teacher. These teachers get a planning period and a lunch break. And don't get me started on the support group at school: lunch, materials makers, cleaning people, etc. etc.
Another reflection. There are many things I will want to start doing with Andres during the day that I will not be able to do or will have to hire babysitters so I can do it. His PT is starting to be more frequent, I can enroll him in aquatic therapy and music class (all free). Hard to do because they are weekday mornings.
What was I thinking.... (Don't answer that!)
I've come to the conclusion to at least one thing. If I homeschool next year (yes, I said IF), I will be using a curriculum that tells me what to do each week with weekly support meetings like "Classical Conversations" and keep Co-op OR I will join a part-time school (2 days at school, 3 days at home).
So, I will keep reflecting.